Being my final semester in college, I am currently Student Teaching and I just finished planning for a True Life series that I am implementing next week involving real life connections to our classroom. One part deals with math, “True Life: I’m addicted to Math” (because even when we don’t LIKE math… we have to use math everyday and its providing a purpose for my students.” The other aprt is a board in which my cooperating teacher and myself are incorporating a resource that will allow us to get better insight of our students. “True Life: Sometimes I get frustrated” and “True Life: Sometimes I need help”. Well this is one of those weeks that I’m remember that sometimes life just sucks..
As I grow older the more tainted I become. When I say older I’m not referring to a number of years… I am referring to the life experiences in which we go through that provide us with wisdom and outlook. The experiences that force us to grow up and become wiser beyond our years are the experiences that make us grow older. Here we are, about to graduate college and feeling so torn between feelings of excitement, eagerness, and promise; and feelings of confusion, intimidation, and nervousness. We think that because we all grew up at a young age and experienced extreme loss, pain, and angst that once we move on/away that the nightmare and ‘growing up’ part is over.
It is these tragic moments of loss that we are grounded and reminded that sometimes life just sucks. In times of grief, people feel obligated to say something to you. They are awkward about it, because they want to say the right thing. Most of us know that, in most cases, there’s nothing to say. There are not answers. No words can displace the pain of a broken heart. Sometimes the hardest part about being in these situations is actually watching the people most affected. Referring to my last post, Blinded by the Closeness, I acknowledged that sometimes being on the outside looking in, can be incredibly difficult; feelings of helplessness as you watch people that you love suffer and break completely knowing that you can’t do anything to fix it. Sometimes, the best thing you can do is to just be there. To sit with someone and hug them or just say, “I love you”. What else can you do?
I come from a community in which we often see one another in pain and dealing with loss. We have this deep desire to fix things when they’re broken… but unfortunately, there are not always answers. I come from a community that aches for one another in times of trouble. People that drop any judgement, and drop their own problems in order to come together to mourn together, to remember, to laugh, to celebrate; to do whatever it is we might need to do at that time. Unfortunately, these moments happen much more often than we’d like them to.
I don’t believe that ‘everything happens for a reason’. I believe that in hindsight we are able to see that something positive can be gained from all situations. But I do NOT believe that we are all pawns picked up and moved by a greater power. Doors open and doors close and ultimately we make choices every day. But unfortunately… I also believe that sometimes life just sucks. I’m doing what I can to make sucky moments not so sucky… what are you doing?